C-Notes for ALL!!
So guess what this is.... did you guess it? My 100th post! I know. We've come a long way together. Me writing about my day. You reading about my day. Me toiling away here at the computer for hours upon hours. You in your underwear -- sitting in front of that "community computer" at the group home. Me filing a restraining order. You carving a butter sculpture of my face.
Man. This weekend. Where to even start? Most importantly, I need to name this weekend's Employee of the Month. In the past three days, this person has endured NCAA discrimination by way of CBS, an onslaught of toothless bar patrons looking to get in her "kimono," and an easy lover who just wouldn't quit. Yes, Stephanie Wan. You are this weekend's stand-out lady. We salute you.
Today at school, Stephanie will be presented with a polished oak plaque bearing her name, measurements, and social security number. This honor will open up a million doors for Steph. Maybe the AG's office will finally take notice of her...
Landlord should be here any minute. He's ffffiinnaallly going to fix that damned window. Finally.
TTYL. BFF. LMAO.
posted by Julia @ 6:46 AM
4 Comments:
big ups to giving big ups to LTD. If you ever need to find (scavenger hunt?) four meth heads, some chatty idiots and a black midget, LTD is the transit company for you. They also had a commericial with a fake ska band of teenage chicks singing "Take another ride on L-T-D!" Ahhh memories.
One million posts! It seems like it was yesterday that you were screaming at me from the other room to "fix my fucking HTML, you stupid asshole!" Ah, memories.
Congrats!
WOOHOO! I freaking made Julia's blog and I got an award. I feel so special. I'd like to thank Julia and Ryan and Erin (for whose endless patience would allow me to sit on their couch and yell at their TV regarding a subject they care nothing about), Ted for introducing me to horny rugby players, and of course may parents for raising such a classy individual.
[and now - a scene from Stephanie's big post-award Q & A session where she holds the plaque and stands in front of that damned backdrop with "Employee of the Month" repeated all over it while answering questions from reporters]
"I can't believe that I forgot to thank Wanda, the 50 or 60 year old skank from that rejected bachelorette party group at McNally's!!! Without her dedicated knit poncho action, everyone in the bar would not have looked so good by comparison.
Wanda's blinding inner beauty has been squashed from years of binge drinking Busch tall boys, groping young men in bars, and bleaching her hair until it begged to fall out. Tragic.
So thank you, Wanda, taking the pressure off of me by taking home all of the dudes who hit on me and performing quadruple-penetration sex acts with them. The photos were inspiring!"
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